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Impersonations include Scottish singer Susan Boyle, who is engaged in secret talks to conquer America; first lady of France Carla Bruni as she arrives in Washington, D.C., to present the Obamas with gifts, including a special song for the U.S. first lady; an Idaho meth cooker whose plans go up in smoke; a woman who was kidnapped as a child and held hostage for almost 40 years by her father; and an airport-security screener on her way to be feted at a Homeland Security gala.